God's mercy is greater than my sin

Henri Nouwen once wrote: “God’s mercy is greater than our sins.”  Unfortunately, we don’t always live that way.  “There is an awareness of sin,” he continues, “that does not lead to God but to self-preoccupation.”  We get so focused on our sin that we take our eyes off our God.  “Our temptation,” Nouwen concludes, “is to be so impressed by our own sins and failings and so overwhelmed by our lack of generosity that we get stuck in a paralyzing guilt.  It is the guilt that says, ‘I am too sinful to deserve God’s mercy.’  It is the guilt that leads to introspection instead of directing our eyes to God.”  Ever been there before?  I know I have.

I get so preoccupied with my sin that I fail to even acknowledge (much less experience) God’s mercy.  I get stuck inside myself and can’t seem to get out, wallowing around in my guilt and shame to the point where I never allow God to come and bathe me in his mercy and love.  Instead, I get caught in a decaying orbit of gloom, despair, and hopelessness rather than claiming the love and life and forgiveness God offers.

“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love,” say the words of the ancient prayer.  “According to your great compassion blot out my transgressions, wash away all my iniquities, and cleanse me of my sin.  For I know my transgressions and my sin is ever before me.” (Ps. 51:1-3) But I also know the depths of your mercy, and that makes all the difference.  Your mercy really is greater than my sin.  It is enough to cleanse me so that I will be clean, to wash me so that I will be whiter than snow.  Help me to truly believe that, O God.  Help me to believe that your mercy is, indeed, greater than all my sin.  For only then will I be free.